by Mario Bonas
The term “Renaissance man” has often been a moniker referred to often in tribute to my late father Prior Bonas. I prefer a term more apt to describe the hardened and calloused path my father took, one that emphasizes a more well-rounded representation of the man he was. It would be one that expresses distinction, strength of mind and spirit but embodies his blemishes and the fallibility of great men – the Rubber band man seems more fitting. During his final weeks in a losing battle with cancer, in a collective effort to soothe his mind and extend those lucid moments that seemed to be quickly diminishing we played his favorite songs. Classics from the Spinners topped the list and they were played in a constant loop. My favorite was of course, “The Rubber band man” whose lyrics describe a pied piper type musician that blew the minds of his listeners, the life of the party. Don’t get me wrong, my father was no carousing roisterer; far from it. Having said that, if we dissect the term “Renaissance man” it means a man of many talents and areas of knowledge. And these words hold true, as Prior exemplified these traits fully having explored a variety of professions and respectable stations in his decorated career. The lyrics “so much rhythm, grace, and debonair for one man” poignantly captures those sentiments. And yet while the rubber in Rubber band man demonstrates a resilience and practicality reserved for ordinary people, it was the use of this trait that ironically elevated him to the heights of extraordinary and exceptionalism.
He was quite emphatic when he insisted he was a Canadian first whose heritage was Trinidadian. Prior could have been described as the quintessential Trinidadian and he represented quite a unique fraternity of men. To this standard I think it is safe to say that they – in their saga-boy, ol’ talk, strong willed, bacchanal baked, hoity-toity manner, are a dying breed. He represented a place in time post World War II that birthed a unique way of life that was cemented into the minds of Caribbean men. For some that proverbial chip on their shoulder either sank them or propelled them to improved standards of life. Prior was among the latter who were part of a wave of migration that scattered them to the UK, Canada and the United States in the early 70s. At that time with the traditions of family the parental responsibility of raising a bastard child as I was, would have derailed such lofty plans. Going against the grain, Prior only carried with him the sturdy tools he had crafted at St. Benedict’s College in San-Fernando and his brief stint at the Siparia Magistrate Court in Trinidad. Never a man to rest on his laurels his toolkit grew in size as he aspired to even greater heights and accomplishments in Rubber band man fashion. Despite his high aspirations Prior never let pride get in the way of his goals. As a jack of all trades and possessing and indomitable entrepreneurial spirit, he tried his hand as a landscaper, repair man, and even started a janitorial business called The Bonus Cleaners before working for the Toronto Transit Commission. Joining the Toronto Police Force in 1973 seemed like a natural career path for a man of his background with a propensity for the law and enforcement. He spent 13 years as a police constable and detective where he earned the nickname “The Fox”. Although this was bestowed upon him from the exclusive bonds forged in the locker rooms of male camaraderie, it was also symbolic of the heights of the unlikely trajectory of a Caribbean man - being one of the few blacks on the force at the time. It would appear that he had outfoxed them all. I connected personally with this sobriquet as my late mother often referred to him unconsciously and privately as the "Twentieth Century Fox". There have been several meaningful coincidences in my life and this was another one. By this time Prior had earned the hand of his beautiful wife Sandra in marriage and embarked on proudly raising three sons, myself included. After retreating from real-estate during a down turn in the economy in the late 90s Prior returned to his familiar path of law. After serving as a Provincial Prosecutor in the traffic division, my father Prior was then honourably appointed as a Justice of the Peace in 2001 dutifully serving in this capacity until 2014. Besides being a man of many talents and knowledge he possessed an unfailing work ethic, was eloquent in the delivery of his testimony on the bench and befriended many within the legal and enforcement fraternity.
Prior carried a radiant pride for his culture and it could be heard whenever he spoke, never disguising his heavy Trinidadian accent. This would later serve him as an unofficial ambassador to Trinidad and Tobago. Under the corporation known as Metnor Marketing, a name that adjoined the names of his parents Meta and Norman, Prior was the first distributor of Carib beer, (brewed in Trinidad) in Canada. Later through various social club memberships like the United Achievers of Peel, Cara-Bram committee and The Islanders International he sharpened his skill as an organizer, promoter and social advocate. He was involved with organizing one of the biggest annual Carnival parties in the greater Toronto area known as the Tennis Court Jam (aka The Doctor’s fete). As the crowning jewel to his cultural pride and social endeavors he was most proud of being instrumental in organizing the tour of a celebrated Trinidadian Steel band group known as The Skiffle Bunch in Canada. His emissary efforts earned him commendation from the Mayor of Brampton who referred to him as a “Brampton Booster”. Before he died, in tireless fashion he was in the process of organizing yet another tour in Panama. Prior and my mother Sandra enjoyed their retirement days as snowbirds in Panama until his untimely death.
He will be remembered most for the gentlemanly manner in which he comported himself with decency, decorum and grace. If I can identify one of his many strengths it would be his unflagging ability to build and develop friendships. He possessed a flexibility that allowed him to adapt to any situation, befriend anyone in any social circle or class. Yes, Rubber band man works just fine. Prior lived not just by words or good deeds alone but by action to which his wide-ranging network were the fortunate beneficiaries. Growing up around him I often wondered how he managed so many people, so many friendships with genuine connections in a never ending queue – our telephone never stopped ringing. He had a joy for life and placed a high premium on family and friendships. And as I and my brothers Matthew and Tyrone built our network of friends they also became his friends and fell under the mentor-ship that also shaped their lives.
The grieving process has been a formidable one. It is said that most trees have roots twice the size of what is visible above the surface. Like unearthing a big tree, along with its toppled canopy revealing its many roots is like revisiting every memory or connection that the tree’s fibrous root has outstretched to support its heaving branches, limbs and leaves. I wouldn’t be going out on a limb if I said his influence was massive. As a whole, like that uprooted tree, death forces you to assess life’s meaning, its importance and the inevitability of one’s own demise. Maybe that is why we mourn, not for the dead....but for ourselves.
“Hey ya'll prepare yourself for the rubber band man You've never heard a sound Like the rubber band man You're bound to lose control When the rubber band starts to jam...”
The Rubber Band Man – The Spinners
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